John Carter

  John Carter is a big loud adventure movie with old fashioned heroics and a straightforward plot. And theres nothing wrong with that.  Its simplicity overall may leave some viewers wanting, and its vagueness to certain details may leave other viewers confused, but despite all this odd and underperforming storytelling I don't think anyone would argue that John Carter isn't very exciting.

  With a largely unknown actor headlining the movie in the title role, it feels like a bit of a risky gamble in an age where actors are cast for popularity before they're cast for actually being right for said role. (See: The Green Hornet) This is a gamble that Disney made before, to moderate success nonetheless, with Tron Legacy. However, the advertising and tone of the marketing scheme for 'Carter brings to mind a failed Disney attempt to jumpstart a new franchise in Prince of Persia.  But not all their attempts at franchising failed. They turned some heads with the Pirates of the Carribean franchise, and despite people's personal opinions on the movies, the steady flow of PG-13's meant Disney wasn't taming this property down for kids. I was mostly optimistic John Carter was in good hands with Disney, however, looking back at the similarly marketed Prince of Persia gave me pause...

  Fear not, the dull action heavy promo scheme does little to capture the good old fashioned adventurous feeling in the movie.  It evokes an early Star Wars feel, with a simple good versus evil sensibility. There's your hero, your damsel in distress, and the bad guys.  Its a tried and true formula. We've seen this type of stuff before, but I never get tired of seeing it. What feels fresh is the look and execution of the movie. Its easy to see why it took so long to get this made properly.  Amazing special effects are manditory here. Theres a whole alien race that are practically nine feet tall, have four arms, long necks and tusks on their face. That would be hell to make convincing with subpar CGI and even worse with prosthetics and animtronics. Thank god it has been made in the right era. The post-Avatar era.

  The movie is never short of eye candy spectacle, from the sweeping desert-like Martian landscape to the gleaming glassy cities of Helium and Zodanga, their airships and locale, all of it is simply wonderous to behold.  Through the action scenes and the quieter moments, its all very colorful and interesting to look at. Visually, this movie is great. Plenty to take in.  The action scenes are of the higest swashbuckling caliber and at times they're fully enhanced by some clever tricks and alot of CGI. Good CGI mind you. It works for the real elements on the screen instead of replacing them.

  The actors do wonderfully in their roles and although you may not see anyone reconizable headlining this thing, there are plenty of familiar and famous actors peppered throughout supporting roles. It raises the standard I think, and it shows. There are real emotions on display here. You can see it. There isn't any 'weak link' that stood out to me. I was pleasantly surprised all around.
  And overall John Carter is a fun, classically minded ride thats full to the brim of high-flying action, genuine humor, and plenty of charm to make up for its narrative shortcomings. I fully recommend this movie. Its an ideal summer flick. Hopefully the blu ray will hit right smack in the middle of a summer heat wave, it'd be the one to buy.

The Adventures of Tintin: The Secret of the Unicorn

  For those who got excited about this movie because Steven Spielberg is directing...
You will not be disappointed. At all. This is a shining return to top form. Not since Raiders of the Lost Ark has an adventure movie been this much fun.
  For those who got excited about this movie, because they're familiar with the comic strips by Herge, won't be disappointed either. Not in the least. The story unfolds like a 'best of' amalgam of several of Tintin's greatest adventures.  I've read enough to know that all the characters get their due diligence and are brought to life with lots of respect and gusto.

  We need more kinds of these movies. Its action packed and clever enough that the adults trade knowing stares and smiles over the kids sitting between them, and the same kids will get quite the kick out of the humor and high-flying adventure. Its an all around ideal movie.  It brings to mind the Indiana Jones movies, and even ones like The Rocketeer.  The evolving dynamic between the two main characters is priceless and endlessly entertaining to watch. As is the entire movie.

  Its also rare to see a 'sidekick' like Tintin's dog Snowy, done justice.  Most are relegated to menial comic relief, not deserving of any respect. However, Snowy is a vibrant character here that steals the scene on more than a few occasions.  He does a good job as a sidekick too. Tintin is always finding himself in trouble, and his faithful dog is always helping him out.  For those familiar with the character, you know theres still a third party to be seen here that'll round out a very fun dynamic. Captain Haddock. Played by Andy Serkis in another iconic performance, he's the third part of the classic dynamic here.

  I think the story might've been better served by a live action treatment, despite the fact that several of the best scenes in the movie wouldn't have been remotely possible, or at least- plausible, in live action. But, there's a mild disconnect. The computer generated characters are some of the best I've ever seen, but It's still computer effects on display. It's just off enough to be distracting when you least expect it. It brings them to life, but not all the way.

  I won't delve into the story much, or give anything else away but its a really really fun ride that brings to mind classic adventure and high flying fun of the best caliber possible.  I stress that its faithful to its origins and manages to breath life into Tintin in a way even I wasn't expecting. I highly recommend Tintin to people of all ages, its not just a kids movie. Its for anyone looking for some good old fashioned fun and heroics. Not bad at all.  I'd see it again, and again. Its a Spielberg classic for this generation. A return to top form and a flashy one at that.

Machine Gun Preacher

  Like Lean on Me, Machine Gun Preacher has good things to say.  It has a good cast to say it.  Its something people would listen to.  But just like Lean on Me... alot of the message gets lost in the process.

  Unlike Lean on Me, which could've been fixed up easily with a few extra scenes, Machine Gun Preacher suffers from shoddy editing and haphazard directing. The movie can keep your attention and tug on the heart strings, but its put together so poorly that you'd think it'd be better off as a sunday sermon from a passionate preacher behind a pulpit.  Because the movie is preaching to you. Its speaking volumes.  Its a tale of redemption, salvation, perseverance and ultimately going the distance and doing good deeds.

  All the actors bring their A game here. Bringing their characters to life with gusto. You feel passion and heartbreak, pride and joy, from them its all believable.
But the movie constructed around these characters is pieced together really badly.  There are powerful emotional scenes that highlight the film throughout that are so damn good, you find yourself wondering how they pull that off, yet drop the ball completely with the simple stuff.

  Characters appear in scenes, apparently doing important stuff, stuff we feel we should know about. Yet we ultimately have no friggin clue whats happening until the scene is practically over. But no, don't worry, you didn't miss something. Thats just how awkward this movie can get.  Characters have revelations out of the blue, undergo fundamental personality changes, and do things with no apparent cause, and all this with very little and often no explanation at all.  When thats simply not bad enough, the editing makes it worse, cutting scenes prematurely, intercutting random stuff and overall doing a great job of confusing the hell out of me.

  All this is truly a shame because this movie could have been a must-see emotional powerhouse. As it is... its a mess. A mess with amazing potential and some truly moving moments of raw emotion and intensity. You have to weigh the pros and cons yourself.
I don't regret seeing it, but I'd have to think HARD before seeing it again.

The Grey

  The Grey really isn't for people looking for a simple action/survival movie.  It will almost certainly leave those people with a knot in their stomach.  The movie instead is a much more introspective, emotional handle on the same thing.  At times its incredibly visceral and intense, and at other times its quiet and poetic. If you're not ready for a strong emotional ride that will drag you through the trenches, then don't bother. Because odds are you won't be able to appreciate this amazing movie.

  As you probably gathered from the trailers, a bunch of guys survive a plane crash and must brave artic weather and a pack of vicious monster-like wolves in order to survive.  Theres a scene very early in the movie that sets the entire tone and defines Neeson's character, John Ottway.  I won't spoil it, but its very sad yet strangely calm.  You don't see many scenes like this in movies.  It was a very stunning scene and very unique as well.  I knew right away where this movie was going and that I was going to love it.

  The atmosphere of the movie is very matter-of-factly. Its not styled like a big budget action movie with survival elements, despite being marketed that way. The only think setting it apart from entering that almost documentary shot style is the handheld camera and such. It doesn't feel like we're looking at actors on a movie set, these men genuinely look tired, scared, and on edge.  After so many movies that have tried to do the same thing, I'd become desensitized to feeling the impact. Almost all of them have predictable endings. You can tell by halfway in whether its going to be...
A: Everyone survives - Happy go lucky ending
B: Everyone dies - Horribly pessimistic, yet probably most realistic
or
C: The two handsome lead actors survive but for some reason end up fighting each other in the end. 
  Its predictable... and boring.  Some may consider this a spoiler alert, but I knew vaguely the same thing before I saw it and if anything I adjusted my expectation of the movie accordingly. Which was the best thing that could've happened since I was expecting a big action vehicle.
The ending is practically ambiguous. Its about the push forward, the will to survive, 'the last good fight' as it were. Not about the rescue helicopter swooping in at the perfect moment and saving the day. Do -not- expect that. Its not going to happen.

  This movie is an experience. Its not casual viewing. Not for me at least, its emotionally gripping.  Something to think about after the end credits role. Its thought provoking for sure. Maybe not on a surface intellectual level, but on a deeper emotional level. Maybe I'm just reading into it, and maybe I'm not. But this, for me, is the foremost ideal life, death, and survival movie of the last decade.  And I seem to stumble across most.  The acting is completely convincing, I was immediately drawn in, and totally hooked. The score excellently compliments the acting and the story, infiltrating scenes subtly and augmenting the actors' great performances, heightening the emotions on display.

  The Grey deserves a watch. Its incredibly well made. For those who are interested, and the ending is resolute enough for you, stay after the credits. But I could've easily done without that because the ending is amazingly powerful in its own right. Great flick.

I Am Legend

  I've seen I Am Legend a few times. Each time hoping I'd like it more than the previous time. However the nhilistic ending, that made little to no sense when put in perspective with the rest of the story, just... made me hate it so much.  Fortunately, I've now had a chance to see the alternate cut, with a different ending.

  Theres alot to look at in this movie. A post apocalyptic New York City grabs your attention right away.  Its visually intriguing in a big way. Its scope is unrivaled. Zoo animals have broken free and roam the streets, prowling around like its their native territory.  In an opening sequence, Dr.Robert Neville (Will Smith) goes hunting for deer. In a sports car. With an assault rifle.  On the untamed streets of NYC. Its strange to see this. But at the same time its fascinating in its matter-of-fact nature.  Its the odd aspects of the day-to-day post apocalyptic life that appeal to me in I Am Legend.

  I actually could care less about the vampires, er... 'Hemocytes' as this 'scientifically correct' tale will tell you, are whats left over of a miracle cancer cure that had unexpected side effects. Obviously.  But its still too self-conscious to call them vampires or zombies. They do seem like a vicious hybrid of both though.  They're also clearly computer generated. And while its definately effective and properly creepy, there is still a disconnect. I know I'm looking at CGI. 

  And rather than using CG to augment a actual person on set standing there in full makeup, from what I can tell these creatures are 100% computer generated.  Its interesting to look at, but... I still have issues with that aspect.  This is completely overshadowed by Will Smith's amazing performance here. Say what you will about the movie, but his acting here was impeccable.  There are strong, powerful scenes, that really call for some deeply convincing emotion, and Smith pulls it off in spades.  Its hard to not feel moved in these scenes.

  Also, the action scenes are incredibly intense. They're staged well, executed well, and are chock full of clever camera tricks and bursting with nearly palpable suspense.  I can't praise their technical execution enough. They really are thrilling to watch.  As a whole the movie is a very unique one, and its one definately worth seeing. The rest of this review however will be dedicated to reviewing the alternate ending. 

 But before I delve into that, I will say this for any newcomers, don't bother with the theatrical cut. The alternate or "unrated" cut is the only version I can truly recommend. The movie is flawed enough without the odd and unfit ending of the theatrical cut, which was my biggest complaint about the movie. This cut fixes all that.

  Throughout the movie it was consistently hinted that the hemocytes were actually capable of intelligent thought and emotion. But that subplot was abruptly dropped in the final act of the theatrical cut. However not only does this cut (spoilers?) fix the needlessly nhilistic original ending and leaves on a much different tone. The well developed hemocyte subplot is now fully realized and comes to a satisfying close, however this does sacrifice the plot-line of Neville's cure. But despite that, this ending is my preferred resolution to the movie. It feels much better and well thought out. And is preferably optimistic.

  Some may say the upbeat ending diminishes the tone and impact of the movie, but I beg to differ.  An ending which needlessly propels the core protagonist into martyrdom and manages to leave you cold and unsatisfied is the ending which does the real diminishing. 

  Only the alternate cut is worth my time now.  Its way more cohesive and nicely optimistic.

And in such a bleak situation would a little optimism really hurt?

I Saw the Devil

  Very few movies can go this far, get this raw, and not end up labeled torture porn. What this has in spades beyond any movie that's set up simply for the gore, is emotion.  The writing and the excellent acting compliment each other very well. We can relate to and connect to the main character right away. He feels like a real character. Its set up incredibly well.  The story is strong yet simple, and it packs one hell of an emotional gut punch.

  When a secret agent's fiancee is brutally murdered, he drops everything to hunt down the serial killer, and in the process blurs the lines between good and evil.  Its a very simple set up, but its effective like you'd never believe.  Once the movie hits its stride, it raises some very thought-provoking questions that'll stick in your head long after the credits roll.  Its a very intense movie, and one thats hard to take your eyes off of. The violence is never cut away from, it relates the pain and brutality perfectly. In a way that not even your typical horror/slasher film can do. 

  I Saw The Devil generates tension and suspense in really clever ways, using a fantastic score and lots of camera tricks to pull this off. And it does. Of course all this would be rather flat if the actors didn't turn in fantastic performances. Each one of them embody their characters with passion. From the tragic protagonist, Kim Soo-hyeon, played by Byung-hun Lee, to the scary and haunting villain Kyung-chul played by Min-sik Choi, every member of the cast is perfect and their acting is outstanding.

  The movie is however, NOT for anyone with a weak stomach. There is heavy violence towards women, young women, even young enough to be considered children. There's an attempted rape and many brutally graphic scenes of bloody violence. Nothing is sugar coated and nothing is kept from sight. This doesn't ever come off as gratuitous. It gives the movie a strong edge, by not playing around with its audience. You could say its an honest movie. Brutally honest. Its a standard format revenge flick, but its made with brilliant skill. Its a gorgeous looking movie as well, making every scene interesting to look at. I wouldn't say it goes out of its way to force style down your throat, but theres never a dull looking scene.

  Its a chilling movie, that will mess with your perception of right and wrong, and will put the protagonist into very dark places.  I recommend you see this movie if you can handle it, and only when you're emotionally stable. The movie is an emotional roller coaster as it is. It will drag you through a range of emotions, from deep sadness, to the brink of tears, and then to accute and unbridled anger. Its an incredibly potent and extremely well made movie. But clearly not for everyone.

Immortals

  If the trailers hadn't grabbed your attention, than you most likely won't find much cause elsewhere to see it.  The trailers showcase the action scenes and the visuals. Which is pretty much all this movie has to offer.  So if you're looking for anything else, you'll be sorely disappointed.

 On a very obvious front, Immortals sets out to deliver on a specific front: action.  In-your-face, brutal, gory, action. It goes far enough to one-up 300 and any other contender.  If you're in this for a greco-roman gorefest of epic proportions, then you'll be pretty happy.  But the Immortals fails on many fronts.
The story is gibberish. Its so backwards and sideways, pretty soon you just start to not care. All you end up needing to know is this guy is bad, this guy is good, and one is gonna die. Despite lots of backstory and plentiful setup, we're still scratching our heads far too often. It gets to be pretentious and practically headache inducing.

  However, the film is visually stunning. Not a single frame isn't dripping with visual flair and style.  Its definately a feast of eye candy.  And like I've said, if you're a gore hound who digs the brutally realistic and over the top battles that you'd expect from an R rated epic the trailers have made this out to be, then you will definately not feel gyped on that front. However, I feel like the movie didn't have enough in it overall to warrant a lengthy review.  Like theres not much to even say about it. Let alone find good things to say. Its hollow and plodding. It falls like a big heavy rock into a shallow pond.  Don't get me wrong, it can be entertaining. Its visually thrilling and stylish to a fault, its fast paced, action packed, and has young good looking actors delivering fine performances, basically its a silly popcorn movie.

  But its one that has vast stores of unrealized potential. It could've been a truly classic epic worth discussing for a long time if its story had been stronger, and it had some emotional meat to it. Its not nuanced or layered, its one dimensional and simple as all can be. And while that is perfectly passable sometimes for a silly little action movie like Clash of the Titans, a movie like this has such perfect aspects that are truly worth marveling at but its marred by such painful shortcomings that its hard to reccommend it.  The best thing I can say about it, is that once it hits home video formats, it'll be sure to give your HD equipment quite the intense workout.  Visually and otherwise. Its gorgeous looking.
So given everything I've said, I urge you to decide for yourself.

   Its a hollow piece of dreck that manages to look quite stunning, and can even keep your attention for a couple hours. So flip a coin eh? It all depends on what you're expecting from it.

Dylan Dog: Dead of Night

 
  The only way I even knew that Dylan Dog was a comic book before it was a movie, was an ad on the back cover of an old Star Wars comic I had.  Yep. Thats it folks. Super nerd has never read a Dylan Dog comic. And the best I figured back then, was he fought zombies or something.  Well I can say, if I was a fan, I'd likely be almost offended. First off its a pretty mediocre film. Second I heard it changes alot.  But its not entirely devoid of any redeeming values.

  Its about a private eye who used to be a protector of the supernatural world. Not like another dimension, but vampires who run rave clubs, zombies who work 9 to 5 and go to support groups, and werewolves who own meat packing plants. Yeah. Whole other world right next to ours. Anyway, Dylan and his assistant find their way onto a supernatural case, a werewolf killing, and obviously theres alot more to it than meets the eye. Big apocalyptic deal, end of the world type stuff. However the movie never really lives up to the tall tales it tells

  I haven't too much else to say about it. I summed it up quite well when I posted the following on a forum I frequent:

  "A harmless actioner which is capable of only just keeping your attention.
It has a handful of clever moments and cool scenes, however you have to wade through a muddied plot, some bland acting, painfully standard action scenes and a smudge of hammy dialog.
Having said that, its fun to watch Sam Huntington. He steals the show, leaving a rather 2-dimensional Brandon Routh in the dust. Routh's performance may leave much to be desired, but he fills the shoes of witty action hero quite nicely. At least asthetically if anything.

Its just a simple flick, better than most SyFy movie-of-the-week garbage.
Keep that in mind when you find yourself about to watch "Mongolian Death Worms".
If your expectations are low enough and you've nothing better to do, you might find yourself mildly entertained. Mildly"

  Yup.

Dead Leaves

  I have precisely 102 movies on my Netflix instant queue. And somehow I still find myself painfully bored not in the mood to watch... anything there. Its a frustrating situation. Fortunately, browsing the endless depths of the handy movie browser that rests conveniently on my PS3's XMB... I found quite the potent cure.  Anyone familiar with anime in general might think they know what to expect here, any one who's seen the random and wild stylings of the animated epic, Heavy Metal, you might think you've seen it all. But they'd all be wrong. Incredibly wrong.

  The box art didn't do much to attract me, neither did the description, but I suppose that was it. It was the short runtime of 52 minutes, and the fact that it didn't really jump out at me. I was in the mood for something not-boring. Something new. Different. Something wild. And oh boy. I got that in spades.
The story here barely hangs onto the coattails of the action, which literally never lets up, and very literally starts right away.  These two oddballs, Pandy, and Retro wake up on earth, naked, and no clue how they got there. Pandy's hungry, and Retro, who has a TV for a head, is just gawking at her nude body. But the general consensus ends up being to start a massive random crime spree just for the heck of it. But they don't forget to get something to eat first.

  Despite their awesome skills, insane agility and supernatural strength, they eventually do get captured by the police. And they're immeadiately, and I do mean IMMEADIATELY shipped off to a life sentence in prison. The weirdness has only just begun.  I shant spoil it any further, but its definately a weird thrill ride. Its the kind of ADHD, over-sexed, gross-out, immature, nonsensical, insane, and super fucking weird animation byproduct of the youtubing, 4chan'ing, internet generation that exists only 'because'.  Theres a rhyme to it, but no reason. But thats half the fun.  You're just along for the ride with these two crazy characters. They have a kind of intimate dynamic despite the fact they're practically total strangers.

  Don't get me wrong. This movie has the depth of a shot glass.  Theres no moral center. Theres no lesson. Theres no message. Its just full out bullets, blood, sex, gore, more bullets, loud music, explosions and such. Its just escalates more and more and more. The style gets exceedingly frentic and eccentric as it goes on. And just when you think the movie has hit its stride, found its groove, settled in, it jumps right back in your face again, and escalates even more. Just to push the envelope.
Its impossible to stay bored while watching this. Its a pure shot of entertaining nonsense right into your brain. If that sounds like something you'd like to experience... seek it out. It'll be worth it.

The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo

  I haven't read the book,or even seen the original movie, as soon as I learned David Fincher was helming this remake, I knew that I wanted his movie to be my first introduction into this story.  Its a decision I do not regret.

  There are plenty of place online to hear a recap of what the story is and such. And I find it saves time and space if I cut to the chase and simply deliver my thoughts and opinions on the movie.  I personally loved it.  I'm a David Fincher fanboy and can't help but compare this to some of his other movies. He has a penchant for wild opening credits and pushing the envelope there visually. Well I take my hat off to him with the opening credits for 'Dragon Tattoo. It has more wicked style and nuance in those couple eye-popping minutes than some directors have been able to invest in a lifetime of filmmaking. 

   This is dripping with style.  Which doesn't just end there, even mundane shots are shot with skill and they're simply eye catching. 

 It really is hard to take your eyes off of this movie.  Due also, in no small part to the charcters Daniel Craig and Mara Rooney have brought to life. Its very easy to get completely immersed in Mikael Blomkvist and Lisbeth Salander's (Craig and Rooney, respectively) character development.  Because its handled so damn well.  Scenes and actions move forward their development, revealing more about them to us, which in turn pushes the movie forward. By the time the end comes around, you're left wanting more. Not that the film is lacking, but you want more of these characters. Their dynamic is something awesome to watch. Something that was actually developed, not something just cobbled together for the sake of plot cohesiveness.

   Its great to see something so well put together. The film is a great drama with classic mystery tropes and all the right ingredients of an edge of your seat thriller.  Its a damn good movie.

   Its not always a subtle movie, but its nuanced for sure. There is a really interesting piece of foreshadowing in there that I won't give away, but its pretty gripping when all that comes to pass. I can't stress enough how well made this is. I loved it.  Its not always easy to watch, some moments are pretty brutal, but its a movie that is worth it. What is promised, is delivered. And what we have as a result, is another fantastic David Fincher movie.

Wanted

  Undoubtedly this movie has its legions of passionate haters. Which can promptly be divided into a few distinct categories. Fans of the comic by Mark Millar and J.G.Jones. People who think the movie is an offensive exercise in gore and profanity. And those who just can't suspend their belief when the movie starts spitting in the face of the laws of physics.  Well, I never read the comic, I don't have a problem with gore or profanity, and I'm really good at suspension of disbelief. It seems this movie was aimed at people just like me. If you fall into any of the above categories... you'll likely hate the movie. So do yourself a favor, stop reading this review, and go do something else. Seriously.

  If you're like me in the above criteria, and you're in the mood for a spot of nihlistic fun... then pull up a chair.  Wanted is quite a ride.  We follow cubicle-bound loser Wesley Gibbons (James McAvoy) as he discovers, through an explosive encounter with the sexy Fox (Angelina Jolie), that he's the son of a super assassin. And subsequently being a killer is in his blood. Quite literally.  After a little intense pursuasion, Wesley promptly ditches his menial office job, and goes to join "The Fraternity".  A fraternity of super assassins as it were. Led by the mysterious Sloan (Morgan Freeman). Wesley learns of the assassin who killed his father and left the fraternity, and how its now his destiny, issued by fate itself, to exact revenge on the rogue killer and put a stop to his murderous rampage.

  Sounds pretty awesome.  Who wouldn't like to ditch their pathetic boring lives and learn to be a super assassin who can fire a gun, and curve the bullet around corners with a simple flick of the wrist?  Hence the physics issue. But at this point... I could care less if its the most impossible thing in the world. It looks really damn cool.  As does most of the insane stunts and action scenes in the movie.  From flipping entire cars over other cars, to having a shootout in a derailed train thats dangling off the side of a bridge with a 2000 foot drop, to leaping out the side of one skyscraper to land on the top of the one across the street... everything in Wanted is pure adrenaline. More concerned with what looks amazing, rather than whats actually possible.
In any other movie, like say... Transporter 2. This kind of approach is just silly. But in Wanted, the rules of the world around the characters in the movie, bend to the will of the story. Its all tied together by a common thread, and explained away in tedious dialog by important sounding characters.

  Surprisingly, it all works extremely well.  James McAvoy fits his role perfectly. From loser to badass in the span of two hours and its irresistably entertaining to watch.  From his snappy and rather naive lines early on, to the "f**k you" attitude he quickly learns to adopt, he's great in this role. And impossible to take your eyes off.  Its pretty impressive too, that with a cast that includes Angelina Jolie and Morgan Freeman, that McAvoy steals the show. Completely.  And what a show it is! Its packed from start to finish with graphic bloody violence, those clever voice overs with the snappy dialog that the 'Fight Club' generation seems to love, and lest we forget the incessant profanity.  Is the movie a little immature? Yes. Yes it is. But its also intelligent and emotional despite its bold and crass exterior.  It has a bit to say if you listen closely enough.
But even if you don't, and you're just here for the action, you're in for quite a treat, and a breath of fresh air.

  Wanted is fast, fun, bloody, clever, and original. So what it strays from the source material like its the plague? Its its own beast. Like it for what it is. If you don't, feel free to hate it for what its not. The rest of us will continue to have a damn good time with it.

District B13

  District B-13 almost embodies everything thats wrong with modern action movies. However it gleefully skips over the biggest pitfalls of all, which not only saves it from being a gimmicky mess, but makes it a wholly entertaining ride that I can reccomend on a clear conscience.  From the Transporter movies, to The Fast and The Furious movies, and beyond, modern action movies feel too poorly thought out. I can't tell if they haven't an intelligent thought behind them, or if they have just too many to make anything worthwhile and cohesive.

And lot of the time they're chock full of unwanted and unnecessary CGI which lends a glossy feel to the movie, and disconnects us from the action.  However, every once in a while, you find one of those movies that should have no right to be as awesome as it is. It uses every tired gimmick possible, but does a good job of embracing such stuff instead of pretending like its more important than it is.

  If any of that seemed at all a little confusing, I don't blame you. The state of modern action movies, is confusing. And its hard to find the right labels to slap on there. For now I'm gonna go with "sloppy" and "careless".  Of course there are always exceptions to the rule. For instance, The Bourne Identity, and Taken to name a couple. Both movies operate like a well oiled machine. Whereas the typical musclebound schlock tends to stumble from one mind-numbingly implausible situation into the next with no regard for continuity (or the laws of physics for that matter).  While I can't say D-B13 is anywhere near the calibur of Bourne or Taken, it feels fully thought out. Like they had one solid idea, fleshed it out, stuck with it, and made a flashy, over the top, action movie that feels right at home within this idea.

  The movie's gimmick is parkour.  The characters, especially the two leads, are damn good at parkour. And the insane stunts they do look really really cool.  Its not CGI folks. As far as I can tell, this stuff looks 100% real. Which only makes it cooler, because people doing dangerous stuff for real obviously has a quality differential between wire frame animations cranked out by a computer. Real stuff has gravitas and impact.  CGI, when used right, can augment a situation or scene in a movie. But I do firmly believe that it has almost no place in a standard action flick. Unless we're talking... Wanted, or Ninja Assassin.  But those are a whole 'nother matter entirely.

  Another thing D-B13 has in spades is personality and charisma. The lead characters are simply fun to watch. They're never given much time outside of action scenes to expand their characters beyond plot devices and such, but the actors clearly do bring their a-game to the roles and they do it with gusto.  Its just fun to watch these guys trade off one-liners with a dead serious face and then flow right into kicking ass.

In any other movie this would've been so hokey. But these guys really sell it. It works surprisingly well.

  The movie is set in a 'future' where the ghettos in france have become so bad that they've built massive police patroled walls around them. Keeping in the 'riff raff'.  And also, keeping in about a million innocent people who just want to live their lives. But now they're boxed in with the worst of the worst, with no way out... and no law.  Thats just the setup folks. Now, the government lost a new experimental bomb they were transporting through district B-13 when the transport van was hijacked. So they assign their token super cop to go in and disarm it before all of 2 million people in this mega-ghetto are eviscerated when the bomb goes off. But the cop needs a guide to navigate the concrete jungle of district B-13, enter his partner to be, the vigilante: Leito.  Born and raised in the district, Leito fights off the drug dealers and gangsters to keep his own building to himself, his crew, and his family.  They find out that the same drug lord, Taha, who has the stolen super bomb (which had been accidently primed and is on a 24 countdown to 'boom') is the same drug lord who had kidnapped Leito's sister, Lola, 6 months earlier in a face off that landed Leito in prison instead of Taha.  "Lola and the bomb. Two reasons to stick together." the cop says to Leito after he breaks him out of prison. Its clearly a plot device to keep these guys together. But its one that works regardless of how obvious it is.

  The movie has style, flair, and decent camerawork showcasing all the action scenes, and they're all really intense and cool to watch. Theres not much more I could ask from a movie like this. Its just total shameless fun. Totally recommended.

Pray for Death

  Another Sho Kosugi action vehicle where he moves to America, gets mixed up in some bad business, his family's safety is put at risk, and he must once again unleash the ninja and kick some serious ass.

This doesn't differ too much from his last movie I saw, Revenge of the Ninja, however, this one is nowhere near as corny. Its actually made far better and can be taken almost entirely serious throughout.  There are, of course, stupid moments, silly dialog, flat acting, and the like. But thats to be expected here. Unlike Revenge, these moments dont scream and holler and draw attention to themselves like a man-child at Chuck-e-Cheese's. 

  Akira Saito (Sho Kosugi) plays a mild mannered businessman in Japan, with his perfectly normal family, in their perfectly nice looking house.  His wife however wishes to move back to America, where she's from. Against his better judgment, Akira agrees. They all move to Los Angeles, California, if I remember right, and they plan to open a nice Japanese restaurant. In the ghetto. Yeah.  But no no no, its okay see? "All the big business is coming out this way. This whole neighborhood is up and coming!" says the kindly old man who sells them the property. Unaware that crooks have been using the abandoned part of the building to store stolen valuables. And when one of the crooks gets a little too greedy and decides to keep the stolen jewels for himself, the blame gets tossed around until it lands on the building's new owner: Mr.Saito. Instantly placing him and his family in harm's way. He must "flash his fighting spirit" once again to protect the ones he loves and clear his name with the criminal underworld.

  Now, aside from a little teaser in the beginning of the movie, Sho Kosugi only actually dons the ninja gear towards the end in the big climax. Which isn't a problem at all, unless you came here looking for wall to wall ninja action.  For that, I suggest you go back to 'Revenge of the Ninja'.  This isn't to say though that the movie isn't totally action packed. There isn't five minutes without some kind of action scene going on.  And a particularly fun car chase with Kosugi, again, running after a moving vehicle. He seems to have a knack for that. Lots of fun to be had here. If not a bit dated. Its not a movie thats aged terribly well. Some movies can be timeless and still dated, this one really shows its age though. And seeing as how its bereft of the hilarity and ocassional awfulness of Revenge, you're left with a mixed bag. Its not corny enough to land it in cult classic territory, and its just competant enough to reccomend for a simple two hours of fun, but don't expect pure awesomeness.

   That being said, Pray for Death is pretty fun for what it is. If you dig the eighties and like Sho Kosugi and all his ass-kicking awesomeness, then you'll probably love this movie.  There definately are some great moments in here, and the climax is super cool, but overall its just pretty standard martial arts/ninja flick fare.

Revenge of the Ninja

  Digging through old musty VHS bargain bins at out of the way pawn shops and old rental joints and you're likely to find plenty of 'Cannon' movies. A film studio that would produce hundreds of low to medium budget movies from 1963 to 1993.  These movies are cinematic junk food. Most made on a shoestring budget or on a quick money-grab whim. They aren't exactly synonymous with terms like 'good' or 'quality', god forbid the terms ever meet 'good quality'. To call anything in their lower rung of titles 'good quality' would be an insult to the adjectives themselves. However... you can definitely, and with clear conscience, attach 'fun' and 'carefree' to most of these flicks. Enter: Revenge of the Ninja.

Shinobi III: Return of the Ninja Master

  Its rare I review video games on here.  But this is actually the first time I've reviewed a game that isn't for the PS3.  It was actually for the Sega Genesis. And it was released in 1993. And it currently stands in front of Dead Space 1 & 2, as my favorite game... of all time. And not without just cause either.  Read on to find out why.
  Shinobi III: Return of the Ninja Master is as classic as they come I suppose. I've played one and two, but wasn't nearly as impressed. They're both solid games. But they feel fairly standard. Whether thats because I'm used to newer games, or whether its because they play more towards difficulty and Shinobi III plays more towards speed and action, I can't honestly say. But Shinobi III still holds up today. For what it is, its perfect.
 
  I play lots of flash games, and find that the good ones, the fun and addicting ones, strongly echo lots of early cartridge games. Their simple design asthetic, or their simple yet satisfying control scheme, theres lots of inspiration to draw from a whole generation of cartidge based games.And what better setup for any simple sidescroller than Super Mario Bros.? Its simple, fun, and addicting. However, if you're into a more action based game, and would rather fight ninjas right now than go jump on mushrooms or something, Shinobi III is the game for you.  Its now just as easy access as any garden variety flash game, and its way more fun. It can hold its own with the best of them and come out on top.

  Each level is unique and actually pretty neat to look at. Despite the dated graphics, it still looks really really cool. Theres a surprising wealth of detail and nuance to the design of this game. You can tell they really pulled out all the stops for this one. The gameplay itself is also something to be praised. Its fast, and fun, but also as the game progresses it forces you to be creative and intuitive.  You feel as though you're an expert ninja by the time you're done. And its really cool because the bad guys aren't limited to just ninjas... theres four armed mutant samurai, hi-tech futuristic soldiers, mechanized brains armed to the teeth with lazers, machine guns, and frag grenades. Lets also not forget the giant mecha robots, and flying ninjas. Oh and theres a Mecha-Godzilla you'll have to fight too. Pretty cool huh? 

   With all the skill and finesse of the game's iconic protagonist, Joe Musashi.  You stick to shuriken and your faithful katana as your go-to attacks through the game, but its not always as simple as that. You must have a sense of timing, and try to anticipate whats coming ahead, which in and of itself is quite a trick.  The result of all this intense gameplay is quite satisfying. Its one of the most involving and unabashedly fun games I've ever played. And if you compare it to the pantheon of flash games or gameboy titles, it still holds up really damn well, and kicks all kinds of ass in the process.

  In conclusion, Shinobi III, is the quintessential sidescroller ninja game. You jump, run, and slash your way through 7 lengthy and action packed levels that are classic tests of skill and patience.  As the iconic white-clad ninja, Joe Musashi, fight your way through legions of ninjas, samurai, soldiers, mutants, disembodied brains, dangerous mecha robots, mystical creatures, deadly traps, hi-tech fortresses and finally... your arch nemesis: Neo Zeed.  Next to the classic Sonic the Hedgehog and titles like Comix Zone and Altered Beast... Shinobi III: Return of the Ninja Master was the best thing to happen to the Sega Genesis way back then, and its still a damn fun ride today.

Ninja Assassin

  Everyone has their own concept of what an ideal ninja movie would be.  Set in modern day? Or in the past?  Slow burn character study about honor and betrayal? A cheesy mystical fantasy take? Or perhaps a balls-to-the-walls slaughterfest?  In case you couldn't tell by the picture above, Ninja Assassin was made by a bunch of dudes who shared in the mutual idea that the perfect ninja movie would indeed be a gory slaughterfest. And, while I think its lacking a few elements to make it the quintessential ninja movie of all time... its certainly a perfectly awesome slaughterfest.

  Ninja Assassin is about Raizo, a trained killer who defected from his clan, and now they're out to kill him for vengeance. Its pretty much just like that more or less.  Eventually an Interpol agent gets caught up in the whole thing and Raizo has to save her life because she knows too much and now they're trying to kill her too.  There's a wealth of detail I'm leaving out, but since these reviews normally feature a plot synopsis, I had to put one in even though its inclusion is pretty irrelevant. The movie's title generally speaks for itself...

  Well, Ninja Assassin speeds ahead at a breakneck pace, only stopping when absolutely necessary to deliver essential backstory, character motivation, and plot details. All of this is handled well. Especially the backstory.  The overall plot is rather thin, but if you stayed past the opening sequence, than you're probably part of the demographic who in this case, just doesn't give a shit how thin the plot is.  Even though, typically, I do give a shit, in this instance, it really isn't necessary...

  This movie coasts by on, and boasts about two things... Lots and lots of ninjas.  Which we get. In spades. And endless loads of gore.  Which is awesome.  Buckets and buckets of blood flash across the screen in each spectacular action scene which all evolve into awesome set pieces that keep escalating and escalating until its time for more story.  Each action scene is bloodier and longer than the last. And they keep coming at an insane rate.  This is why I love this movie.  It sounds incredibly two dimensional and shallow... but its a perfectly ideal gory ninja movie.

  Its a massive slaughterhouse full of bloodthirsty ninjas and anyone who gets in their way is just more meat for the grinder. The bodycount in this movie... is ridiculously high. I don't think anyone in their right mind could keep track.  Its just brutal.  Its incredibly graphic in its swordplay and such, which results in many many MANY dismemberments, decapitations, impalings, and the like. Is it weird to say this is what I've always wanted to see ninjas do? Eviscerate anyone in their path?  Its a nice word. Eviscerate. Very appropriately used too.

  In conclusion, if you're looking for something intelligent, mature, and emotional... stay away. Please. The people who love this movie are tired of hearing the same complaints from all the haters. Yes, it hits all the pitfalls of your standard action fare, but it pulls off its meal ticket: the action scenes, with style, and skill. And in something like this, that's all I signed up for. Action. And I got it. Lots of it.  Thats what this movie does well. Taking some pretty standard concepts, putting a fresh spin on it, and delivering a stylish, intense, blood soaked action flick. If you're not super freaking eager to watch an hour and a half of nonstop graphic sword fights with legions and legions of ninjas... then don't bother. However, if you're like me, and never tire of seeing such awesomeness as this, please go ahead and treat yourself to this epic piece of cinematic junk food.

Raging Pheonix

  From the Netflix descriptor, the box art, to the actual first ten minutes, none of them seem like they belong to the same movie. Its wildly off putting. The box art boasts gritty stylized action, the descriptor promises a low rent revenge flick, the movie in its first act... is colorful and silly as hell.  However... is it possible that by the end credits, I've experienced all three?  Its a madcap, silly, gritty, action packed revenge adventure that is totally unexpected and one that I was totally unprepared for.

  Half an hour in, and I'm sitting through some intense overacting, thats coming across blatently silly, and the tone is wacky.  I'm incredibly close to turning it off and looking for something else.  Characters jump into the scene without being introduced, legions of bad guys appear from nowhere, and the movie takes its damn time to explain itself. We dont have answers to wild shit from the first act, until the third.  Its also so frequently silly and goofy that its, at those moments, impossible to take seriously.  Human trafficking, murder, revenge, rampant alcoholism.... and theres still room for slapstick humor? Getting your ass stuck in a bottomed out chair. Yeah. Sorry, what?

  Tonally, this movie is ALL over the place, and some stuff moves WAY too fast narrative-wise, its hard to keep up, but its even harder to actually buy whats happening.  The lead character goes from being an angst ridden, whiney, girl in a grunge band... to martial arts MASTER in days? Well, wait, the movie is never quite clear on that. Has it been weeks? Months? A year? Come on guys. A training montage doesn't really tell us how much time has passed.   The movie eventually explains everything it needs to, but by the time it does... we're in completely new territory, mentally unprepared for whats going on.

  That being said, the characters have nice dialog, great chemistry, and they all do their damned best to bring believeability to their roles. Its no easy task, but eventually you learn to just... go along with it.  Once you can just surrender and take whatever comes at you, you might find that this movie is a real gem.  For starters its visually impressive. Colorful and well defined, locations and settings are vibrant and alive. Its a gorgeous movie.  Secondly, the fights, when played seriously... are awesome.  They have impact and gravitas, and at just the right moments, they're slowed down so you can drink in that epic kick and watch it connect to that guy's face in slow motion.

When the fighting is on display, it makes the movie make sense. Not the narrative, not the plot, not the drastic sharp turn into "where the hell did THIS come from?" not any of that...
The fights inhabit their settings so damn well it gives the movie a reason to exist and it gives you a reason to watch it. Also the girl is really cute. Two reasons. There. Go watch it. Have fun.

Deep Rising

  If you're only familiar with director Stephen Sommers via 'The Mummy',  'Van Helsing', or  'G.I.Joe: The Rise of Cobra', boy are you missing out.  If The Mummy is his best movie, then its not hard to say Deep Rising is a strong second.  Its a great movie, but its strengths aren't in its originality, or its script, or its plotting, or the acting, or any of that really.  Its great because its fun.  All of the stuff mentioned above is competent enough, to be passable.  Which is where the rest shines through.  Its chock full of great one liners, a thoroughly likable lead, a cool looking creature, lots of slime and tons of awesome gore. And like another personal guilty pleasure, 'Critters', it never takes itself too seriously.

   In Deep Rising, there's always time for another grin-inducing one liner. Even if the characters are on the run. The movie starts with our hero Captain Finnegan and his two person crew, who have been hired by a small squad of mercs to sail them out to apparently... the middle of nowhere - no questions asked.  We're soon privy to Finnegan's motto: "If the money is there, we do not care!" Catchy isn't it?  We soon find out, that the merc's destination is actually a massive cruise liner.  They're in business with someone aboard it, to sabotage the ship, and loot it for all its worth. But before Finnegan and crew actually get the greedy mercs to their destination,  the cruise ship is suddenly ravaged by giant mutated deep sea creatures who've surfaced... with an appetite.

  The movie takes off rather quickly, and only builds up more tension and suspense from there.  Every technical aspect is handled exceedingly well.  The music, the score, gets occasionally tacky, but it does its job when it needs to.  Visually, the movie is pretty standard for something like this, until you get to the special effects. Which are awesome.  The final big reveal looks a bit dated, obviously, but the creature itself still looks pretty badass! Then comes the gore effects, which both cgi and actual made stuff, both look stellar.

   In vein of the Roger Corman flick, 'Forbidden World', all the bloody, slimy, gory stuff is delightfully realized and incredibly well handled.  Its rare you can take a movie that on most accounts should be a contrived, cliche, boring, mess, and say wow... this is loads of fun.  I keep saying "well handled" and "awesome" over and over, but I do firmly think those two descriptors fit this movie best because all the usual pitfalls a movie like this stumbles into, Deep Rising avoids it with some 'well handled' decisions and lots of 'awesome' B-movie attractors.  Its full of big guns, classic corny dialog, a damn cool looking creature, and a rather pre-X-Men Famke Janssen. I also just can't get over how likable Treat Williams is as the hero here. He handles the leading man role very well.

  The supporting cast is just as fun with genre favorites like Kevin J. O'Connor (The Mummy), Wes Studi (Heat), Djimon Hounsou (The Island), Jason Fleyming (Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels), and Trevor Goddard (Mortal Kombat)- all in full scenery chewing mode. If their melodramatic acting wasn't crazy enough, their over-the-top death scenes won't disappoint! Well, for the ones who do die at least. There's yelling and running and screaming galore, with a healthy dose of profanity and macho posturing. The pleasantly familiar sounds of the sci-fi/horror/action genre. And, it is indeed all three- Sci-fi, horror, and action. It delights in being equal parts of all three, and to a crazy extent. The climax involves an indoor jetski chase, while the hero is armed with a shotgun. Are they outrunning explosions? The creature? Both? Does it matter? It's awesome looking either way.

  It's a self aware movie, because how could it not be? It's Die Hard, Titanic and Tremors all rolled into one. The movie is gleefully over-the-top with big guns, bigger explosions, icky monster creatures, and the stickiest and slimiest gore effects you could imagine. It's a big budget B-movie. A throwback to a simpler era of movies where rip-offs were excusable so long as they were entertaining, and that seems to be the creed by which the filmmakers behind Deep Rising lived by. It's not high class cinema by any stretch of the imagination, but it is imaginative. It's big, loud, slimy, bloody, bullet-riddled fun. That's more than enough for me.

Speed Racer

  This movie is a bit of a mixed bag for me.  In a movie that deals with crime bosses who try and feed people to his pirahnas, stock market cheats, someone faking their own death, the loss of a family member, coming of age, and big corporate sell-outs... things like cute little chimps, and bee-hive catapults welded as a weapon onto a race car, feel slightly out of place. It'd be one thing if the Wachowski's juggled the vastly different tones really well, but they don't. For every moment of seriousness, its either suddenly interrupted or intercut with something silly and juvenille. Does this severely detract from the enjoyment of the movie? No, not really.
You have to accept it and just push forward. Trust me. Its worth it.

  I wanna make a note of the designs. Everything from Speed's helmet, to the engines in the cars, and Racer X's outfit are wonderfully designed and more intricate than you might expect. They're sleek cool and futuristic, and look like they belong in this vibrant and colorful world brought to life.  The world these characters inhabit, seems to be pretty oversaturated.  Every color is cranked up to '10' and the whole damn thing feels at first like maybe your TV is out of whack. Not even the cartoon was THIS colorful.  However, the Wachowski's set their trippy tone very quickly, and its essentially a warning. If you can't handle all this color and oversaturation... get out now.  Its not a realistic movie at all.

  Furthermore, this cast is great. Susan Sarandon, John Goodman, Matthew Fox, Emile Hirsch, Christina Ricci, and more. Every cast member inhabit's their respective role perfectly.  Not much more can be said really.  The do their absolute best with what their given. It shows.  Even when their in ridiculous situations, or delivering hopelessly corny lines, they all play it straight, which is a very good thing.  Even the hammiest line in the movie can be met with at least a chuckle instead of a facepalm. It seems pretty aware of how corny it gets.  Its ideal audience would be one who can embrace that corniness as much as it does too.

  Fortunately for the rest of us, beyond its corny moments, is some damn impressive special effects and some pretty jaw dropping action scenes.  Each action set piece eclipes the last in a big way. The drivers use their cars as weapons pretty much. Or really, as an extention of themselves. And its a massive kung-fu fight with their cars going at insane speeds. Theres all kinds of cool little surprises in store here, and lots of mind blowing eye candy. Its in these races and action scenes where the movie excels from 'good' to 'great' and then kicks into gear 'awesome'.  All this leads up to an extremely well constructed and pretty emotional climax that gets me saying 'wow' every time.  Its impossible to not get impressed by how well this climax was handled. Its purely awesome.

  I was pleasantly surprised at how much of a heart this movie had, even more so than it's source material. There was a strong emotional core to the entire thing and all the actors brought their A-game. Speed's storyline, faithful to the show, certainly tugs at the heartstrings- and for every big action sequence, the Wachowski's set up a parallel emotional conflict to compliment it. The movie is more than your average racing flick, by far. It's a globe-trotting adventure movie with epic scope. You won't find another movie like this one anywhere else. It's visually stunning, and the races are flat-out spellbinding.

  In a day and age where complaints about CGI in movies are 90% of the entire internet, Speed Racer embraces it's effects-heavy nature with confidence and gusto in a way few movies could ever be brave enough to. Though one should expect nothing less from the Wachowskis. They're great at this sort of thing.

  All in all, Speed Racer isn't for those who can't handle a little silliness now and then.  But if you're willing to brave it for the spectacular action scenes, then be my guest. It won't disappoint.  But if you're one of the ones who absolutely love this movie, every line, every scene... then I commend you. I wish I could love it as much as you do. But unfortunately, the in-your-face silliness in some scenes is just a total turn off for me. Otherwise, Speed Racer is thoroughly enjoyable and damn fine eye candy and an amazingly faithful adaptation of the cartoon. In that regard... it's close to sheer perfection.

Mission: Impossible: Ghost Protocol

  Wow. That word can pretty much sum up this movie. In an age where 'mindless fun' and 'popcorn movies' are synonymous with 'pretty damn horrible' and 'Michael Bay' (not saying there's a huge difference) its incredibly refreshing to see a mindlessly fun popcorn movie thats smart, sleek, fast, and very exciting.

  Having said that, it's nigh impossible to not compare this one to the others. Thankfully, this one avoided all the pitfalls of the second movie, hits all the high marks of the first, and matches the adrenaline-pumping pace of the third. Is it the best one yet? I'd say not exactly.  But its so damn good its on par with the best of them.  The plot itself is pretty easy to follow, not sure if thats good or not but it looks like complex plotting is a thing of the past.  I wish I could just say each movie gets simpler than the last, but M:I:2 was an all time low.

The story is simple. On a mission in Russia to uncover a potential terrorist's true identity, Ethan Hunt and his new crew of IMF agents are framed for the bombing of the Kremlin.  The entire Impossible Missions Force is disavowed and the secretary of defense himself briefs Hunt on his next mission: Find the terrorist bad guy. Stop him from inciting global nuclear war.  But be careful, if you're caught... the blame for all of this will be swiftly placed on your shoulders.  Fun times eh?

  Series star Tom Cruise returns to the only franchise he's really taken seriously for anymore.  I bet he could do this in his sleep. Although, his performance feels a bit more dispassionate than what we saw in M:I:III, Cruise still blazes through one massive action set piece after another and he looks right at home.  Its a welcome return to the world of espionage and action.  Also starring Simon Pegg from the third movie, and newcomers Jeremy Renner and Patton, they all slip right into this established formula laid out by what you've come to expect from a Mission: Impossible flick. Its really cool. They all gel exceptionally well. Especially Renner and Pegg. Some of they dialog they have just makes some of the movie's funniest moments.

  Which brings me to another point, the humor.  Its nice to see a M:I movie with a sense of humor. I think the first one was pretty subtle when it came to that, the second one was a bit wonky, and the third, the grittiest out of all four, had maybe two-three brief funny moments in the whole thing?  Simon Pegg's expanded role from the third provides some decent humor. Occasionally it feels slightly out of touch with the tone of the scene, but never out of touch with the character.  I had quite a few laughs in this one. Every funny moment was well written and nicely handled. Top honors guys.

  Next is the action. It can go without saying that action was never the series weak point.  But they've really truly hit their stride with Ghost Protocol.  Its not just shootouts and such, there are big action set pieces that will really keep you on the edge of your seat. They're expertly crafted, and as they go on, they kind of evolve.  Nothing ever pans out 100% the way it's planned for Hunt and co.  Instead it escalates, and escalates. You find yourself saying "Oh geez, it can't get any better than this."
And then it does.  From rappelling down the side of the tallest building in the world, to a gritty and powerful car chase during a massive sandstorm, to a clever and intense climax thats happening in two-three different places at once. Its a globe-trotting adventure that makes good use of its varied, eye catching locale.  Its stylish and loads of fun.

  You really can't go wrong here.  Although it has little to elevate it from a simple, entertaining popcorn flick to a masterful action outing, its two hours of wall-to-wall expertly crafted action and excitement. Everything you could expect and more from the fourth movie in a franchise, and its precisely the kind of movie a Mission: Impossible should be.
I'm up for more. Maybe even two more?  C'mon guys... your mission should you choose to accept it...

Keep up the good work and keep us coming back for more.

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: The Movie

  Power Rangers ruled my childhood from the time I was old enough to watch TV. So basically three years old.  Fun times.  It just must have been the horrible acting and super obvious plots that kept me coming back week after week to see if the Power Rangers would defeat Rita Repulsa's latest monster. Soon enough, there was a new head honcho in the house: Lord Zedd.  As Martin Lawrence of Bad Boys fame would say...
"This shit just got real." 
And for a while, the rubber monsters, outdated effects, colorful outfits, and bad catchphrases of the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers was the coolest thing in the world.  Unfortunately its not the early nineties anymore.

  Now, its hard to review this movie without factoring in a huge chunk of nostalgia.  If you obvious don't have the same enthusiasm for the show that I did, this movie will be a cliche',  kid-pandering, colorful, mindless, wreck.  If you do have a penchant for the rubber monsters, colorful outfits and bad catchphrases, you'll feel right at home more or less.  Anyone over the age of 12 that likes this movie, accepts it for what it is. And what it isn't. To be completely fair, its not a good movie.  And even as a Power Ranger's movie its simply okay. Partly because half of the charm of the show, from where I'm sitting, IS the rubber outfits, the tokyo looking miniature cities, and the really outdated effects. All that is gone in the movie.  We now have actual body armored outfits for our colorful protagonists, the fight choreography is better, and the monsters have halfway decent animatronics. The special effects are much improved (as much as can be expected from anything in the 90's) and the villain can be vaguely taken seriously. Somewhat.

  Personally I have to say, when they're all suited up, kicking ass, spouting cheesy one-liners in the heat of battle, and saving the world in all six colors... I like it. Its a saturday morning live-action cartoon with a proper Hollywood budget.  Its fun in a young-at-heart popcorny way.  However when the movie take stabs at character development, only one or two actors in the whole cast has enough believability to carry any development at all.  Its unfortunate too. It seems like they really have their heart into it.  But sadly in these kinds of serious and mature moments, it falls flat on its face and fumbles the ball.  Its like a dog trying to be a cat.  This kind of movie, based on this kind of show, will never be critically accepted. It'll never be synonymous with anything but the kid's section at a rental joint and 'nostalgia'.  Perhaps it should stay that way.

  So, alas, we have our fully American big-budget Power Ranger romp.  With probably one of the best villains the franchise has ever seen. Ivan Ooze.  Say what you will about this movie, but Ooze still makes me laugh. He's the best written, best acted character in the whole movie. He gets all the best lines, a killer outfit and the actor is clearly having loads of fun.  He's a blast to watch.  Otherwise, the big budget charm of this movie wont do much to win over anyone who isnt already a fan. Its a one-off deal. And already a mixed bag at that.  Anyone not nostalgically attached whatsoever should stay away. Its Power Rangers! What did you expect? Good writing? Decent acting? A good story?
No, sorry people. On principle alone, 'The Movie' isn't a good movie.

But, those hungry for a shiny, colorful piece of 90's nostalgia with all the fancy gadgets, blinking lights, bells and whistles one could ever hope for...

It's morphin' time.

Abduction

 
  Taylor Lautner of Twilight fame is clearly desperate to expand his fanbase. Why else would he star in a mindless, hopeless, piece of teen bait that has been ruthlessly advertised since its theatrical release? Oh right... its what he's been doing all along. Why stop now?

  Its actually sad at this point. I mean I'm sure he loves where he's at. Legions of screaming fangirls. Dying to be with him. Lets face it, he may be playing second fiddle to that other guy, but still. I hear he gets lots of shirtless scenes. Despite all that, he's still stuck in a critically reviled franchise.  Aside from angsty romance-hungry teen girls, and bored harlequin-reading housewives, no one else is INTO Twilight. Everyone else can see they suck. No pun intended.

  So with Abduction, which is mercilessly advertised as a heavy hitting action movie, it confuses me from a certain standpoint.  On one hand, it looks like he's trying to break free from his ever-growing stereotype, but in the movie he does little that isn't pandering to his legions of fangirls.  The inclusion of such seasoned actors like Alfred Molina and Sigourney Weaver is puzzling to say the least. They're given little to do, and even less screentime in which to do it.  It'd almost be commendable to Taylor, if this movie had been good. Unfortunately, the great cast, decent editing, and competent action choreography do little to elevate it above anything worth seeing.

  The typical high school teen drama crap is of course first runner up here. Its tired. Its boring. I've seen it a billion times. I almost couldn't sit through it in Fright Night, but Anton Yelchin is charming and has charisma. Lautner does not. He can play popular teen well enough, but in the first half hour the only interesting thing is his parents.  They're pretty well acted.  I only wish we had more time with them.  Not soon after the ball gets rolling, the story forcibly shoehorns in a love interest and writes the parents out of the equation.  The young actress playing his girlfriend-to-be, is not bad in the role, shes a competent actress. But dammit the mere existence of her role dilutes the movie even further.  By the time you realize she's been sucked into this 'game of life and death' you realize that it was merely a maneuver by a writer penning a script. And a bad writer at that. Her inclusion is so obviously forced, its distracting, annoying, and the second big black mark towards this movie.

  The plot is already so bland and standard, I can't believe they actually went nowhere interesting with it.  You wanna break your stereotype? Then break it.  Star in something that'll push the envelope.  The story and the plot feels afraid to go places. Dark places, thought provoking places. Anything remotely interesting. His acting skills aren't challenged at all here. The story seems written around his apparent inability to act. His lines are written so poorly, that even a good actor would have a hard time convincing us someone would actually talk like this.  He delivers them flat and without emotion. I can't say I'm honestly surprised though. These are the same kind of complaints that I've seen hurled at the Twilight movies.

  If anything good can be said about the movie, is that it has some decent editing.  It showcases alot of the action scenes nicely. But when the action scenes themselves aren't much you haven't seen before, good editing isn't going to do it a huge favor or anything.  So after a dismally mediocre story, an incredibly predictable plot, and some pretty wooden performances all around... who the hell am I supposed to reccomend this to?

Self respecting movie-goers?
Save your money. Find one of the Bourne movies and watch any one of those instead.

Fangirls?
Eat up. He has a shirtless scene.

Bronson

  I can't pretend to say I was familiar with this movie at all before I saw it. I knew nothing about it. I hadn't even heard much anything about it. Until, on the online forum I frequent, a friend of mine posted his review of it.  Its a fantastic review, convinced me Bronson was a definate must see before I even finished reading it.  You should check it out as well, cause I don't even think I could put it into better words. Read it here.

  The easist thing to catagorize Bronson as is a 'biopic'. It tells the story of a very real person, in very real times, doing very real things.  But the way this film is crafted, it'd be a crime to catagorize it as anything but 'art'. Its a masterpiece of a movie, that is also simply a stage for Tom Hardy's mind blowing performance.
From role to role, Hardy is never the same.  He becomes the character on the page, and brings him to life in an amazing way.  You hand him a character like Charlie Bronson though... (no direct connection to the actor)
and he'll blow you away. 

  Right out of the gate, you know, that you're seeing something special. And its captivating.  The movie is about Britain's most infamously violent prisoner, Michael Peterson. He's eventually dubbed Charlie Bronson as a fighting moniker from a boxing promoter,  it pretty soon becomes very apparent that "Bronson" fits him much better.  He's shown from a young age, being a very violent person already. But his first incarceration is for the attepmted robbing of a post office.  Only given a seven year sentence, but it ended up turning into a fourteen year stretch because of his incessantly violent nature. He caused so much chaos and unleashed so much violence on the inside, he was constantly shuffled back and forth between various prisons. We're there every major step of the way and its an undeniably fascinating look at this man and turns his story into a captivating journey. By this point he's costing the government so much money in damages and medical expenses, that they certify him sane and set him free.  He'd become far too costly to stay in prisons.  As you may have guessed, its only a couple months before he's back inside.  I won't say too much more about what happens, but its impossible to take your eyes off it.

  We see Bronson in a unique light in this movie. We're able to explore aspects of his personality and internal drive that would be nigh impossible to derive from a typical documentary or a web article.  If I ever had to learn about someone, more than I ever needed to know, I would hope they have a biopic as classy, entertaining and artful as this.

    Its completely Bronson's show here. He's the main character in a very closed off, spotlighted way.  This is kind of tough to pull off well, not letting us really connect to any supporting characters. And its hard enough as is hardly having any supporting characters worth connecting to.  It also doesn't help that Bronson isn't a relatable character. Its often like watching a wild animal pace back and forth in his tiny cage. Full of pent up power, itching to be unleashed, looking constantly for an out.  Prison is like his Motel 6. After a while, it feels more natural for him to be inside, fighting it out over every little thing. He becomes a celebrity, reknowned for his violence. All of this is made real by Hardy's impeccable and nuanced performance.  Every movement is calculated, every emotion brought vibrantly to life, and every line delivered with extreme precision and care.  He has gravitas and incredible physical presence. Its amazing to watch. Even more amazing if you're used to him in movies like Rock N Rolla, Inception, Layer Cake, and such. You have grounds to compare. Hardy's physical transformation is astounding.

  Bronson's whole journey, character arc, whatever you want to call it... is simply captivating. I've probably used that word too often in this review, but it basically sums up the entire movie for me. Bronson is utterly unmissable, incredibly well made, a thrilling work of art thats relentlessly entertaining, and mercilessly captivating.

Rock N Rolla

  Guy Ritchie's Sherlock Holmes movies feel very hollywood in comparison to this. They're action movies. Every other scene climaxes with an action piece. And while he's proved himself quite adept at producing thoroughly entertaining action setups,  by this point it feels like oversaturation.  I have my complaints about the latest Holmes, and even there its "nevertheless" and it is a fun movie.  But Rock N Rolla just ticked all my boxes in a whole 'nother way. 

  In many scenes it feels almost like neo-noir. Or like its a piece of Pulp Fiction, and while it may never quite reach the heights of pure unbridled entertainment like 'Fiction, it entertains in much the same way.  They feel remotely connected in tone and substance, and its a very welcome feeling of familiarity. I enjoy crime dramas alot. Especially the punkish ones like this. The ones who realize they have style. But just short of being labeled 'classy'.  Its too gritty for 'classy'.  Too ballsy. Or at least, it would want you to think it is.

  The in's and out's of the plot, for the sake of keeping this review at a reasonable length, is pretty much irrelevant for the time being but I'll highlight what I can. Its about these massive property deals, and going through unnofficial channels to aquire said property. But when two big wigs of the game, one a london player, the other a russian immigrant, try to cut a deal, and their mutual accountant keeps screwing things up with the help of a local group of troublemakers, things begin to spin wildly out of control. And it all ends up tracing back to a supposedly dead rock star: Johnny Quid.  The film isn't primed as so much to really get you looking for twists and turns, because every plot point seems to be a twist or turn in itself, but there is a massive twist towards the end I totally didn't see coming. It was really well handled too.

 And I can't conclude this review without mentioning the fantastic cast here with Gerard Butler, Mark Strong, Idris Elba, Tom Hardy, Tom Wilkinson, Thandie Newton, and Chris 'Ludacris' Bridges. Every single one of them turns in a strong memorable performance. If any complaints can be made, is that certain characters feel underused or out of place. But in the long run, its because it feels like an episode in a TV show. Like we're already familiar with these guys; backstory and introduction not nescessary right? Wrong. We're given alot of characters to follow, but only given the slightest most basic detail about them. Maybe I missed a tid bit here or there, but the 'lead' character in this movie 'Mr.One Two' (Gerard Butler) actually ends up feeling just a little peripheral. The movie is clearly Achibald's movie (Mark Strong). He's the narrator and the main bad guy's long time right arm.  He steals the show on more than one occasion, and provides some quite memorable dialog.

    The film is throughly enjoyable, and it rides on the typical snappy Guy Ritchian dialog we've come to expect, with lots of wit and charm. The lead characters are fun to watch and the chemistry between them is palpable and classic. Every aspect of Rock N Rolla is handled well. I loved watching these characters navagate this messy maze of crime, double crosses, coincedences, and mystery.  Its smart, fast, funny and total entertainment. Top shelf Guy Ritchie movie. Not to be missed.